People are strange an unusual in many ways, they spend their time worrying and wondering what other people think of them. They try to fit in and belong to a specific group or clic. In essence there is no such thing as an individual or single person just for that reason. For many years I have tried this same approach to life in all aspects. No matter what I have done I have always been on the outside looking through the window and wishing. Never once did I look around me and see that there were other people around, moving about their lives not caring what was in the window and being themselves. That is until someone touched my shoulder and ever so calmly asked “who are you”.

That question has sent me spiraling into a world of indifference, trying to figure out where I belonged, outside the window or inside with the rest. I never realized what it was like to be outside, I spent my whole time trying to figure a way to get inside. I used to be one of those people that when a meal came in a restaurant and was unsatisfactory I would be quiet and eat my meal, and when a waiter came by and asked if everything was ok I would say yes. To avoid confrontation and inconvenience I would accept a substandard meal. I have never been taught who I am, and I didn’t think that that was something that could be taught. It was something that I took for granted. My parents never explained what the world would mean to my life or my life to the world. Until the last two years I would accept things as they were not as they should be.

I thank you Pam, first for asking that question. Second, for not accepting the answer that I gave and thirdly for the advice and guidance that you have given me. This is something that I wanted to tell you before but couldn’t quite find the words. The thoughts and skills that I have slowly acquired will remain for me always. — Paul Deveau